


Least Wanted

by MerryLilHobbit



Series: Newt and Tina [34]
Category: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bullying, Character Study, Children, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Ilvermorny, Implied Sexual Content, MACUSA | Magical Congress of the United States of America, Married Couple, Motherhood, Parenthood, Romance, Self Confidence Issues, Sisters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-01
Updated: 2017-10-10
Packaged: 2019-01-07 21:37:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 12,919
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12241077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MerryLilHobbit/pseuds/MerryLilHobbit
Summary: "Tina, you're always turning up where you're least wanted!"(OR: A study into Porpentina Goldstein)





	1. Chapter 1

Tina hadn’t exactly been planned: in fact, the discovery that she was on her way had been slightly bittersweet for the Goldsteins had been married just three months and were still attempting to establish their respective careers in New York. A baby had not been planned or wanted at all.

It had taken a few weeks for both of them to warm up to the idea – and then they had been thrilled because, despite the fact they hadn’t been married long at all, it seemed only natural to love their child, however unexpected they may be. Both parents had quickly become excited by the news and eagerly waited for her arrival in the following August. Tina had been loved from the very start, and no one could deny that.

In contrast, Queenie _had_ been planned – just a year after Tina had been born, the Goldsteins had decided that another child was just what they wanted; it would be lovely for their children to grow up together so close in age, and so they had started trying almost immediately. It hadn’t taken long at all for her mother to fall pregnant again, and her baby sister had been welcomed the following spring to much love and affection from both parents and her sister.

Her parents cooed and cradled Queenie constantly after she was born, absolutely enamoured by her; she had their mother’s blonde hair, already curling at the ends, and big blue-green eyes that melted hearts. People would stop them in the streets and coo at her too, complementing the Goldsteins on their beautiful new addition even when Queenie had grown into a toddler, and their parents would beam with pride.

Passers-by never fawned over Tina.

She wasn’t anything like Queenie: she had thick black hair that never sat right, like their father’s, and brown eyes that seemed almost dull in comparison to her little sister’s bright colourful ones. It was easy to ignore her with the new baby around, and though she loved Queenie she couldn’t help but resent how much more everyone else loved _her_.

And, to add to insult, Queenie got a cute name to go with her adorable appearance – and Tina was stuck with ‘Porpentina’, a name she could barely even _say_.

One day, whilst in the front room of the apartment, Tina gazed at her sister – now a beautiful little toddler – and wondered if, one day, she’d be as pretty…maybe she just had to wait until she was grown up? _Maybe,_ if she wished hard enough, her hair could be blonde, her eyes blue, and she could be pretty too.

 _I wish I was as lovely and cute as you_ , she thought sadly.

Queenie looked up – and then she beamed, showing off her perfect tiny white teeth, a giggle following shortly after.

Tina was amazed that her little sister was suddenly smiling at her so happily, as if she had heard Tina describing her as ‘lovely and cute’ in her head, and she couldn’t help but smile somewhat shyly back. Queenie had that effect on people, she had noticed, but she couldn’t resent her for it – despite all of Tina’s grievances on the matter, she couldn’t help but love her sister dearly. She _liked_ having a sister, liked having another little girl she could play with (for they were rather close in age), and nothing would change that in her mind.

The Goldstein parents had loved both of their daughters with their hearts, and they loved them equally; their father would tell Tina stories of his work as an Auror and encourage her when she proclaimed she wanted to be one too someday, just like him. Their mother would sing the sweetest softest lullabies as she cooked or cleaned and encourage Queenie to join in. Both would play games with their daughters, reading to them and tucking them in into bed with goodnight kisses every night.

But nothing lasted forever – things had to change, as they always did.

Their father had caught the dragon-pox first, perhaps during one of his work assignments; their mother had nursed him as best as she could – but it had infected her before long too, and the girls had been forced to stay with relatives that they barely knew. They had both waited for their parents to get better so that they could go home again, to continue as they had become used to.

When they had been told that their parents wouldn’t be coming back, Queenie had cried and cried like she’d never done before – she had cried before the words had left their aunt’s mouth, seemingly sensing things in the way that she always did. Tina had wanted to, but couldn’t find it in herself for some reason – instead she had hugged her sister and whispered to her that it would be okay.

She needed to protect her sister – Queenie needed her to be there, to be strong.

It was a very long and difficult night; it took well over an hour for Queenie to stop crying and fall asleep, cradled in her older sister’s arms. Tina had waited until she – her beautiful little blonde sister, so young and innocent, the only one she had left in the world – had fallen asleep before allowing her tears to fall, sobs muffled by the scratchy pillow of the bed in their aunt’s spare room.

_Mama…Papa…I wish I knew what to do._

* * *

 

Despite the fact she had been nervous about leaving her sister, Tina _loved_ Ilvermorny already.

She had been rather pleased when the Thunderbird statue had flapped its wings in approval at her, knowing from her research beforehand that Thunderbird was the house of adventurers (though she wasn’t quite sure that applied to _her_ really), and she had spent her first week drifting around the corridors in a kind of daze. The fact that she was suddenly allowed to learn how to do all of these magical things was _extraordinary_ – it was all she had wanted since she was little girl, having seeing her parents doing magic. It didn’t even matter that she would have to relinquish her wand during the holidays up until she was of age, or that any kind of magic outside of Ilvermorny was strictly forbidden now that she was a student and learning to control her abilities, because for the first time in a long time she felt somewhat at _home_.

The only real problem was that she just found it difficult to make friends.

Part of her wished she wasn’t so shy or awkward, that she could be more like Queenie and just smile to beguile people – the other girls in the Thunderbird dorms had found it more than easy to start conversations and giggle together, even within the first week, and it left Tina feeling rather left out despite the fact she hadn’t _tried_ to talk to them yet. She vowed that on her second week she would do _better_ – she would make friends with the other students in both her house and in her classes: she didn’t particularly mind which house someone was in, so long as she could perhaps be their friend.

She had walked into her Charms class that Monday, a spring in her step and forcing herself to smile as she took her seat near two fellow Thunderbirds and a Horned Serpent student.

“Hi!” Tina greeted, nearly wincing when her voice naturally came out quietly. “I-I’m Tina. Goldstein. Tina Goldstein, I mean.”

The Horned Serpent girl raised an eyebrow, looking somewhat bemused; one of the Thunderbird students, a girl in her dorm, stifled a giggle behind her hand. Tina felt her cheeks flush.

“Her name’s not really Tina,” The girl stated. “She’s _Porpentina_ really.”

The other two were smirking to themselves, highly amused; a boy from Wampus was sitting nearby, and he guffawed as he overheard their conversation. “I’d probably go by a different name if my parents were stupid enough to name me something like _that_.”

Tina really hated her full name more than ever – Queenie had gotten a cute little name, but no, not _her_ : she had to be _Porpentina_ , an oddity, strange and weird.

“Just Tina is fine,” She whispered, trying not to duck her head in shame – she had to at least _pretend_ to be confident, after all. “S-So, uhm…how…how are classes going?”

All of the other students laughed, the Wampus boy turning away from her and the girls shaking their heads pityingly. Tina suddenly wished she’d sat somewhere else, or at least _not_ opened her mouth and attempted to speak.

“Classes have barely started,” The Horned Serpent girl tutted. “We haven’t done _anything_ yet.”

“Oh. I-I know, I just meant-”

“Ignore her,” One of the other Thunderbird girls sighed. “She didn’t bother speaking to any of us last week; I think she’s a bit _strange_ , you know.”

“She hasn’t had any letters either,” The other Thunderbird confirmed. “Her parents haven’t even bothered writing to her.”

Tina felt tears well up in her eyes and told herself that she couldn’t cry – it would be silly to cry, absolutely ridiculous. Perhaps if she explained to them, she thought, that her parents had passed away then they might take pity and treat her nicer. It was worth a try, she reasoned.

“I don’t have…my mother and father…”

Suddenly she was choking on her words, _unable_ to speak; her heart was beating hard in her chest, eyes stinging, and she wished that she could have had her sister with her – if only to hold and hug her. She wanted Queenie with her, wanted to be sharing a room with her again, to be able to see her bright smile and blonde curls.

“…Miss Goldstein, are you feeling quite well?”

Tina nearly jumped at the stern voice of the Charms professor, hurriedly scrubbing her eyes. “’m fine, m’am.”

Professor Stonehart, a most formidable woman who always looked strict and unimpressed, pursed her lips. “Do you need to be excused, Miss Goldstein? I will not have students blubbering through my lessons.”

“No, m’am,” Tina managed, staring down at the desk and _wishing_ she could disappear. “I’m fine.”

After the lesson, she heard the girls giggling and shrieking as they left the room – she picked up snippets, specifically her name and the words ‘don’t want her near us’ and ‘weird’.

 _If only Queenie were here…she would listen and understand. She always has_.

* * *

 

Queenie had, of course, been a most popular student at Ilvermorny from the day she arrived; she had blonde curls that the girls envied, a smile that could charm even the toughest of trolls, and she just _knew_ what to say to get people to like her.

When the Pukwudgie statue had raised its arrow into the air for Queenie, Tina had admittedly been disappointed; she had so hoped that her sister would be in the same house as her, that they could share dorms and the common room together. She had clapped and smiled, however, and deep down she knew that Pukwudgie was a _perfect_ fit for her little sister – Queenie was one of the kindest and most generous souls around, even at a young age, and she would immediately be comfortable in a house that celebrated the heart of a witch or wizard.

Despite being placed into different houses, the Goldstein sisters had still found more than enough time to spend together; Queenie had soon picked up that her older sister was not exactly the most well-liked student in the school and made a habit of sitting with her during meals or the like. Many had been baffled that she – someone who nearly everyone wanted to be friends with – would choose to spend time with her ‘weird’ awkward sister.

“None of them are genuine, anyway,” Queenie announced rather cheerfully at lunch one day when Tina brought this up. “Besides, you’re _not_ weird, Teen – you just get shy is all. I can help you make some friends, don’t worry!”

Tina highly doubted that anything – even Queenie’s wonderful smile – would help her make friends, to be frank, but it was the thought that counted.

* * *

 

The boys at Ilvermorny never paid Tina very much attention; part of this could have been due to the fact that, on her first day when the first-years were being sorted, her full name had been shouted into the hall for _all_ to hear – students still snickered and called her ‘Porpentina’ to annoy her sometimes. Tina knew, however, that it was mostly because she simply wasn’t _pretty_.

She wasn’t ugly, by any means, but she wasn’t stunning or gorgeous like some of the other girls – she was plain old Porpentina Goldstein. Though she wasn’t particularly study-orientated, like the Horned Serpents, she did still try hard to get good grades – she wanted to graduate and get a decent job to provide for Queenie. The sisters were all each other had, and they had to plan carefully on how to look after each other in the future for they had nothing and no one else. She didn’t have very many friends either, though not from a lack of trying – every time she tried to talk to another student, she just felt awkward and unsure.

Though she mostly kept to herself, there were _of course_ the stirrings of feelings towards some boys – she was only human, after all – and she found herself quietly admiring them from a distance; she wouldn’t have dared tried asking one of them out, even some of the nicer ones that had made her feel butterflies in her stomach, because she already knew that they would reject her without a moment’s hesitation. Even worse, by the time Queenie had reached her fourth year she had nearly every single boy head-over-heels for her; it was hard to miss the stares and longing looks that were thrown in her direction – even boys that Tina had found herself liking were interested in her sister.

But then there was William Clifton.

He wasn’t one of the most popular boys, but a boy from Wampus who was in several of her classes and seemed to get on with everyone; they occasionally sat together, and they even talked on a number of occasions. His smiles were always soft and genuine, and he was one of the few who never called her ‘Porpentina’ to get on her nerves. It was no wonder she found herself developing feelings for him, to be honest, and when Queenie found out (through reading her thoughts, that was) she encouraged her sister to pursue it.

“Oh, go for it, Teenie! I’m sure he really likes you – he sounds like a nice guy!”

She had been so happy, so _excited_ , by these feelings that she had taken her younger sister’s advice – she later learnt that she shouldn’t have been so foolish.

At first it seemed to go _perfectly_ ; William just listened and smiled, saying that he liked her too, that she was a nice girl and that maybe – just maybe – they could ‘try’ it out. He’d had a couple of relationships but nothing that had lasted very long – Tina had even less experience – so he suggested that they test the waters a bit before committing to something serious; Tina was so relieved that she agreed without a moment’s hesitation.

It was absolutely wonderful and blissful for all of four days.

They had been studying together in the library, occasionally sending each other shy smiles, when Queenie strode up to their table; even in her robes she looked dazzling, blonde curls styled perfectly, make-up meticulously applied (but not overtly so), and a lovely smile on her face.

“Hello,” She said to William politely before turning to her sister. “I was just wondering if I could borrow some of your notes on charms, Teenie; I got a big test tomorrow, and some of them are giving me some trouble.”

Tina had agreed and reached into her bag for said notes – she carried notes on all of her classes, just in case – without any hassle; when she had dropped her bag to the floor again, however, Queenie’s smile had vanished. She was no longer looking at her sister but at William, as if appalled.

“Is everything alright?” Tina asked, looking between the two.

Queenie was still staring at him as she took the papers from Tina. “No…No, of course not. I was just…thinking. Uhm…Hey, Teen?” Her voice dropped in volume as she leaned closer to her sister, so that William couldn’t hear. “How about we meet up in the hall tonight? I think we need to have a…a talk.”

It wasn’t the first time Queenie had wanted ‘a talk’, though it was usually to do with school or (embarrassingly) to ask for _lady things_ ; nevertheless, she agreed and watched as her sister retreated.

Once she had left the room, she heard William let out a low whistle. “Is she _your_ sister? You look nothing alike.”

Tina shrugged, going back to her homework on dark wizards in history (a topic of great interest to her, she had found). “Yes. She can be a bit full-on sometimes, but she’s lovely really.”

That evening in the hall, Queenie’s eyes had looked sad as she leaned in close to her sister. “That William boy…I’m sorry, Teen.”

“You’re…why?” Tina questioned, confused by this. “What’s wrong with him?”

“Oh, you should have _heard_ what he was thinking!” Her sister whispered furiously, and there was a glimmer in her eyes, as if she were about to cry. “He took one look at me and…and…I can’t.”

“Queenie, tell me!” Tina pleaded, gripping her sister by the wrist tightly. “Tell me now!”

Queenie let out a small wince of pain, trying to pull away from her sister – when this achieved nothing, she sighed and started speaking reluctantly. “He was thinking…these weren’t his _exact_ words, but it was along the lines of…of…” She took a deep breath. “ _Oh, what a bombshell! If only I weren’t stuck with her sister…_ ”

“You’re lying,” Tina denied quickly, refusing to believe it. “You’re lying to make me jealous – can’t I have just one thing, Queenie, without you ruining it?”

Queenie’s eyes were tearful. “Teenie…I’m sorry. I’m not lying, I swear! That’s what he was thinking!”

But Tina had stormed off, furious and angry that her sister would say such a thing; she made the decision right there and then that she was going to find William himself, forget about her sister – he liked her, of course he did. He wouldn’t think something like that!

William would have probably been near the Wampus dormitories, she knew, so she immediately set off to find him; she was just around the corner from the dorms when she heard him laughing. He wasn’t the only one – there was a group of boys with him, by the sound of things.

“…yeah, she’s a doll!” She heard one boy say, and she halted in her tracks. “With those big eyes…and her lips! I could kiss those for hours!”

Eavesdropping was not a nice quality, she knew, but her curiosity was getting the best of her; careful not to make any noise, she ducked behind a pillar and eagerly strained to hear more.

Another boy was laughing again now. “Yeah – she’s Goldstein’s little sister, isn’t she?”

They were talking about Queenie – of course. Boys _loved_ Queenie, wanted to around her and be seen with her. But surely William would say something nice about her, Tina reasoned hopefully; he had to, didn’t he? He liked her-

“Hey, Clifton, ain’t you dating Goldstein? The older one, that is?”

_He likes me. Of course he likes me. Calm down, Tina._

William was chortling. “Yeah – but if I’d have known that the little one was _that_ gorgeous…well, I’d have waited!”

 _No. He can’t have just said that…he’s…he’s probably just saying it to make the others happy, to fit in_. Tina’s stomach was lurching unpleasantly, however; surely she had imagined him saying that, he wouldn’t have been that cruel…

“Can’t believe they’re related,” The first boy snorted. “If I were you, I’d dump the cold fish and get with the blonde one.”

William was humming in thought. “Well…I think I’ll stick with Tina – but only until I can get her sister to go out with me. She can’t be that hard to convince, right, little piece like her?”

Tina stormed away at this point, not caring that her face was blotchy and red or that passing students were staring at her – she needed to get away as quickly as possible.

She had gone back to the Thunderbird dorms, cast silencing charms around her bed and cried that night; it just wasn’t fair! The one boy she had thought she was different, the one boy who liked _her_ and not her sister, was a liar – he _didn’t_ prefer her, didn’t like her in the way she had hoped. No, he preferred Queenie – beautiful, perfect, blonde, kind, caring Queenie. She had been stupid to assume otherwise.

The next morning, Tina promptly told William that she was ending their relationship, much to his dismay, and then made a point of avoiding her sister for the rest of the day.

Despite knowing it wasn’t her sister’s fault, she couldn’t help but feel bitter resentment at the fact that her sister had unintentionally ruined her first and – so far – only relationship. Yes, it was more William Clifton’s fault than Queenie’s – but it was easier to blame her sister, easier to feel jealous of someone so _perfect_.

Queenie got everything, and it just was _not_ fair.

* * *

 

Tina was in her fifth year when she firmly decided that she was going to be an Auror; her father had been an Auror, a highly-regarded one at that, and she had always taken an interest in his work even when she had been a little girl. Truthfully, she had thought about it for a number of years before coming to her final decision; there weren’t many female Aurors, she’d been told, and it would take quite a lot of hard work.

But it was what she wanted, and she was sure of it.

Whispers started around the school, of course, about how strange Tina was for wanting to join the Investigative Team at MACUSA after graduating, and at first they hurt – but she learned to remain strong, even if she was hurting, to ignore them. People would always compare her to her sister, no matter where she went in the world, and there was no point in dwelling on it for the rest of her life – she knew that she was nowhere near as beautiful as her sister, she never would be, and she accepted it.

“ _…Hard to believe they’re sisters, they’re nothing alike…_ ”

“… _The older one got the brains, sure…but the little one, she’s going to go far. She’s got the looks for anything, really_ …”

“ _The blondie is a doll, a catch…so different from her milquetoast sister_.”

It would be ridiculous to be offended over such things, she decided: who needed a relationship when she could have a career for herself? A chance to do the right thing, to protect people? She and her sister would need the money when they left school, need something to buy an apartment or dwelling with, to start over together – and as the eldest, it was up to _her_ to make sure her little sister was provided for.

 _Ma and Pa would want that_ , Tina told herself, and it made her feel slightly better. _They’d want us to look out for each other…and that’s what I’m gonna do._

So she threw herself into her studies as much as possible, working outside of lessons to improve her knowledge; she took extra-curriculars such as the Duelling Club at Ilvermorny, determined to better herself and her skills. The students who had mocked or thought degrading things of her soon were amazed and impressed, and they mostly stopped comparing her to her sister; instead of “the beautiful one’s sister”, she was “that Goldstein girl who’s good at duelling”, and it made her prouder than she cared to admit.

By the time she graduated, she was at the top of several of her classes – and, frankly, no one was particularly surprised at all when MACUSA immediately offered her a place on their Auror training programme.

* * *

 

“Goldstein!”

Tina was immediately on her feet, straightening up as Graves approached her desk; he had a way about him that was stern and controlled, calm and cold. She always felt her face heat up at the sight of him – he really was unfairly good-looking, and while she didn’t delude herself that he would ever think of her in that way, it didn’t stop her from admiring him all the same.

Mr Graves’ face was unreadable as he looked her over, though he did look slightly disapproving – he always did, really. “Apparently you were the one who shut down the illegal trading ring last week. Is that true?”

“Yes, sir,” She said carefully, forcing herself to look at him; she didn’t want him to think that she was weak or just a blushing schoolgirl, after all. “It was mostly Class-B tradeable goods, but we managed to recover a few Class-A goods as well.”

“I see. You were working on your own for this case, weren’t you?”

Tina hesitated. “Yes, sir, I was. If something in the paperwork is incorrect then I’ll amend it immediately, Mr Graves-”

“No, your paperwork is perfectly filled out,” Graves interrupted calmly, still studying her; he seemed to be considering to himself for a moment, debating in his mind before speaking. “Tell me, Miss Goldstein; you’re not a part of our field team, are you?”

“No, sir. I was only out in the field to round up the smugglers.”

He merely raised a brow, almost to himself. “Hmm. That seems an awful waste to me; you took out four armed thugs with barely a scratch – it’s the kind of skill we could use on our team.”

She had learnt a long time ago not to get her hopes up – things never worked out how she wanted anyway – but it was hard not to feel slightly intrigued and hopeful at his words. A promotion was what she had been hoping to work towards – both for her career, and because she and Queenie needed the money. Her sister had secured a job in Wand Permits, sure, but it was hardly a well-paying position – certainly not enough to rent an apartment and cover living expenses, not even when combined with Tina’s salary.

Graves was watching her keenly, like a hawk. “You’re relatively new, Goldstein – new and young. You’re nowhere near as skilled as our top investigators, even if you _did_ luck out with the trading ring last week. However,” His tone was only somewhat softer, lower now. “I would be open to considering giving you training, if you’re willing to put the work in.”

Tina was stunned. “Mr Graves, sir, that…I…”

“It won’t be easy,” He informed her coolly. “And I won’t be easy on you just because of your age or because you’re a woman; if you want to be on my team, then you have to train until you meet my standards. Is that understood, Goldstein?”

“Yes, sir,” She agreed quickly, still flabbergasted by his proposal.

Graves nodded, seeming only somewhat satisfied as he straightened himself up. “Alright. You start training tomorrow – six-thirty sharp. Don’t be late.”

* * *

 

Mr Graves hadn’t been lying when he had told her that he’d work her hard; he was incredibly strict and no-nonsense during their sessions together, pointing out every flaw and every mistake she made – and she needed that, really, to better herself. She made sure to mentally keep a note of anything and everything he said, eager to prove her worth to him: she wanted to convince him that she belonged on the team, that she was focused on the job and wouldn’t allow anything to distract her. Queenie worried a slightly for her health, of course, concerned that she wasn’t eating or sleeping enough, but she always brushed her sister’s concerns off; she was a grown woman, fully capable of looking after herself (and her sister, if need be).

It was six months later that Mr Graves announced she was joining the field team for a raid in a nearby bar – a “test”, of sorts, to see if she was ready to officially be counted as a part of the team. Tina had accepted willingly, of course, more ready to show him that she deserved a part on his team just as much as anyone else.

The other Aurors were stony-faced as Graves introduced her on the morning preceding the raid, unimpressed and uncaring – hardly a surprise, really. Only two offered her rather unenthusiastic welcomes, barely meeting her eyes before getting to work; she had merely shaken it off, reminding herself that they’d most likely warm up to her in due time.

The raid that evening was a success, all of the criminals they had tracked being arrested before they could escape, and several types of illegal goods being secured. Tina hadn’t been able to stop herself from flushing with pride as she disarmed the last wizard and used her wand to tie ropes around his arms and legs to prevent an escape; she just felt so pleased, so exhilarated, at arresting someone and doing something _good_ , something that would make the world a better place perhaps. To add, Mr Graves had offered her the briefest of smiles when she brought the thug to him – small but still, a _smile_. It made her insides grow warm, her cheeks red for an entirely different reason.

The next day, it was made official: she was to join the Investigative Team permanently, with an increased pay raise and a chance at working more dangerous or important jobs.

Queenie had been thrilled at the news, of course, making a special dinner that night to celebrate and gushing at how she had always known her sister would go far in the Auror department. Tina had laughed, shaking her head but secretly feeling pleased with herself once more – with the increase in pay, they would be able to live slightly more comfortably, could perhaps start working towards a better life… Even so, she wished that their parents were there to see how far she’d gotten all by herself – at how well she and Queenie were doing.

Her younger sister had smiled somewhat sadly at her upon hearing her thoughts, taking a sip of her water before speaking. “I know. I’m sure they’re real proud, Teen, wherever they are.”

* * *

 

It soon transpired that not everyone was as thrilled with her promotion as Tina and Queenie were; it was only to be expected, really, given that she was one of the youngest in the department and that she hadn’t been working for very long, and she decided it was silly to take offense over it. She would show them, Tina thought to herself determinedly, just like she showed the other students at Ilvermorny, and she’d prove that she deserved this promotion.

She had been working in the new position for a few months when she was assigned to a more dangerous case; a wizard or witch in the city had been hexing No-Majs for a number of weeks, and whilst no one had been killed or _seriously_ injured, it still meant that a number of Obliviations were required to be carried out. There were two other Aurors working on the case with her, and they gave her half-hearted glares when they were informed that they were to be working with her.

It had taken just a few days for Tina to track down the perpetrator as being the owner of a seedy Wizarding club in Manhattan; he had been in trouble with the law before, and his records showed that he had held a rather low opinion of No-Majs for several years. The other Aurors assigned to the case hadn’t seemed as convinced, deciding between themselves to wait until another attack before making any moves – but she couldn’t do that, not with a good conscience.

So, without a moment’s hesitation, she tracked down his club and apprehended him; it was a bold move, she knew, and risky – he had attempted to fight her off when he saw her, though she had quickly disarmed him without getting hurt – but it paid off.

Mr Graves had raised his brow at her after she brought the wizard in, looking rather unimpressed. “There’s a reason we assign multiple Aurors to these cases, Goldstein,” He reminded her disapprovingly. “He could have taken you out easily, and that would have been that. Next time there’s a case such as this one, you go out to arrest a suspect _with_ back-up. Understood?”

“Yes, sir,” She mumbled, unable to meet his eye as her cheeks turned pink. “I understand.”

He moved away as if to leave before stopping short and hesitating for a brief second. “Other than that, I suppose I should say… Well done, Goldstein.”

Not everyone had been quite as generous about this arrest, however; as she was finishing her paperwork for the case later that evening, she had overheard the other two Aurors on the case ranting and muttering about her to their colleagues. It was impossible not to hear them, and they most likely knew that – knew that and probably didn’t care.

“She just has to barge in,” She heard Johnson huff, his tone frustrated. “Since the first day she’s been a nuisance.”

“I dunno what Mr Graves was thinking,” The other Auror, Norton, agreed in annoyance. “She’s nothing more than a little girl – a liability to the team.”

Tina had deflated in her seat at hearing this from her co-workers, disappointed that they still didn’t view her as one of them even after several months of working together; the point of the job was to arrest criminals and keep the city safe, which she was trying to do to the best of her ability. Most of her arrests had been successful, with the rare two or three exceptions – she was good at the job, she had thought, and eager to improve even so.

 _They’ll see one day_ , she told herself as she picked up her quill once more, forcing herself to think of her recent arrest again: _it’s just because I’m new, that’s all. When someone else joins, then they won’t be as harsh on me. I just have to be patient and work hard._

Whether they wanted her or not, she was going to do her job and she was going to do it right.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is, guys - the second and final chapter of "Least Wanted" :)
> 
> In this chapter, we've got a LOT - Newtina, Jakweenie, Scamander children, motherhood woes, fluff, implied stuff... It's all happening in this chapter!
> 
> I hope you guys enjoy :)

Queenie’s heart had broken cleanly in two when Jacob Kowalski had been obliviated, and Tina didn’t need to be a skilled Legilimens to know it – she and her sister knew each other that well.

Her own heart ached for Queenie, though she knew that it had been for the best; it had been quite obvious that her sister had developed feelings for the stout No-Maj, even before she had given him a parting kiss in the rain, and it had certainly been an affection he reciprocated. Tina, herself, was saddened by his departure; he had been a friend to them, after all, a great help in their quest to recapture several magical creatures…she had grown fond of him, certainly, and it had hurt to say goodbye to him.

It was a few nights later that she made some hot cocoa and decided that a conversation was needed; she was the older sister, for one, and while she didn’t get nearly as much out of these ‘ladies chats’ that Queenie did, it was clear that it was necessary. She made an extra mug for Newt and brought it down to him in his case (much to his surprise, she noticed) before entering the bedroom with the other two mugs; the blonde was curled up in bed, looking despondent and miserable – a far cry from her usual bubbly self.

“Queenie…” She put the tray down on the side table before sitting next to her sister and putting an arm around her tentatively. “I know. We can talk about it if you want – I even made hot drinks… Mama always said that things look better after a hot drink.”

Her younger sister sighed heavily but nodded in agreement. “I guess so. You’re right, Teen – thanks.”

The two were silent for a few minutes as they sipped at their drinks, waiting for the other to speak first; Tina honestly didn’t know what she could say at a time like this, unsure of how best to comfort her sister on such a matter. She’d never had to deal with love or romance, not like this, and a part of her felt guilty because as the older sister she should have been able to give advice.

“Don’t be silly, Teen,” Queenie mumbled, clasping her mug tightly. “You give great advice…and it ain’t like I’m experienced either, you know. Most the guys I been around are far from nice about their thoughts, thinking about me like a piece of meat…not Jacob though.” Her face fell, shoulders slumping. “Jacob is…was…a real gentleman.”

Tina gnawed on her lip anxiously as she moved closer to her sister, putting her drink aside. “I’m so sorry, Queenie. I know you were both…you liked each other a lot,” She said carefully. "I liked him too; he was pretty funny, and he didn’t seem like a bad guy.”

“It ain’t fair,” Her sister murmured, voice soft and weak. “Just ‘cause he’s a No-Maj…such a stupid law. He weren’t about to hurt anyone, let alone tell people about magic – he’d have kept it secret, I know he would have.”

“I think he would have too.”

“I ain’t ever met anyone like him,” Queenie continued, and she sounded close to tears. “I ain’t ever gonna find anyone else like him either – there’s only one like him, Teen, _just_ him. When we was together, I felt so happy and…and he was so sweet to me, so wonderful. He didn’t just think what everyone else thought ‘bout me – he didn’t think I was ‘easy’ or just a pair of legs. He liked _me_ , everything about me…not just the way I looked. It sounds silly, but it’s true.”

Tina was speechless, at a loss for what to say; it wasn’t too shocking, of course, but to find that her sister had developed such strong feelings for a man she’d known for just a few days was admittedly a slight surprise. Her sister – her little sister who she had tried to look after and take care of since childhood – was deeply in love.

Deeply in love with a man that she legally couldn’t be with.

Queenie reached out and took her sister’s hand. “I’m not a little girl anymore, Teen – neither of us are. I do love him – and he loved me, I know he did. If things were different, then maybe…” She stopped, eyes glistening.

“Maybe someday,” Tina said uselessly, squeezing the younger witch’s hand tightly. “They could change the law in the future, right?”

It was a poor attempt at comfort, and they both knew it; nonetheless, Queenie forced herself to smile – it looked hollow and bitter, a far cry from her usual happy beam. “Maybe. For all I know, he could go back to that fiancée – the one who gave him the brush off…she could change her mind, and they could get end up married after all.”

“Queenie, don’t,” She muttered half-heartedly. “You don’t know that. If she left him for…for whatever reason, then chances are she won’t wanna come back.”

Her sister’s bottom lip trembled. “He could find any girl in New York, any blonde, and marry her – any girl would be lucky to have him. He’d be happy and never have to know about any of this ever again…”

“Stop it,” Tina scolded, though there was no conviction behind it whatsoever. “Queenie, there’s no point in depressing yourself – we don’t know what’s gonna happen in the future, so there’s no reason to get upset over stuff that might not ever happen.”

A tear ran down Queenie’s cheek, and she didn’t bother to wipe it away; instead, she twisted and hid her face into her sister’s shoulder. It was mere seconds later that her shoulders were shaking with sobs, a wetness soaking through the collar of the older witch’s pyjama shirt, a gasp muffled by fabric.

Tina soothed her sister, brushing her curls back the way she had done when they were children and keeping an arm around her; she didn’t speak, instead silently offering what she knew Queenie needed most – a shoulder to cry on, someone to care. Her sister didn’t need to be told it would be okay, or that everything would be fine: she needed someone to be there to listen to her, to just be _there_.

* * *

 

The first time she had seen the picture had been the first time she’d been in Newt’s case; it had been a fleeting glimpse, a mere glance really, and she had soon become so occupied and amazed by the habitats outside the shed that she hadn’t paid it a great deal of thought. After all, things had suddenly gotten rather out of hand just half an hour later, what with the Obscurial and Grindelwald being revealed – by the end of the night, the picture was the very last thing on her mind.

She had seen it again just a few days later whilst helping Newt in his case; she had needed the distraction, frankly, needed something to do that would give her sister some space, and so she had offered to attempt to assist the Magizoologist in whatever way possible. Of course, the most she could really do was watch as Newt did his duties and occasionally help by preparing feed in a bowl, but it gave her something to do nonetheless. At one point he had sent her to his shed to collect a prepared bucket of meat for his Graphorns (“Don’t worry, I’ve chopped it up already – if you could just bring it, that would be most helpful”), and it was in this moment that she had looked around the enclosed space properly, taking everything in for herself without any rush or anyone to judge her.

This included the photograph.

It was framed and of a beautiful woman, smiling suggestively as she looked out of picture; something curled in Tina’s stomach at the sight, something unpleasant and uncomfortable. The girl was probably Newt’s lover back home, or something similar, she thought to herself – and for some reason, she felt saddened. Why she felt this way, she couldn’t say, but it made her shoulders droop and her heart ache in her chest. Whoever this mysterious girl was, Newt obviously cared deeply for her – he must have done to carry her picture in his suitcase.

Her mood had significantly lowered after getting a better look at the photograph, even as she returned to the habitats and continued to help Newt; it didn’t even lift after eating the delicious supper Queenie had prepared, nor when she excused herself early for bed. Her sister had frowned at her, clearly having sensed the thoughts in her head, but said nothing; the Magizoologist had joined them for dinner that night, and she knew it would be best to wait until he wasn’t within hearing range before pursuing such a conversation.

It was still rather early in the night when Queenie quietly entered the room, immediately looking to her sister; Tina merely gave a half-hearted smile and returned to her book – it was a conversation she knew was coming but still wished she could avoid.

The blonde sat down next to her on the bed, a look of understanding on her face. “You saw the picture.”

Tina kept her mouth pressed in a firm line, forcing her mind to focus on her book and _not_ the memory of finding the photograph or on Newt.

“Teen,” Queenie said quietly. “It ain’t like that, him and her – they ain’t a thing, not anymore. She hurt him, hurt him real bad, and they haven’t spoken in _years_.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“You’re an awful liar, Teenie,” Her sister tutted. “At least, you are when it’s something you care about. I know how you feel about him, even if you won’t admit it to yourself yet – and I know that you’re upset about the photo.”

Tina finally closed her book, nearly slamming it shut, and huffed. “He’s perfectly within his rights to carry a picture around, Queenie – I don’t care. And I don’t think of him as anything more than a _friend_ ,” She disagreed, though her heart still felt heavy in her chest. “Besides, even if I _did_ think of him like that then there’d be no point in it… I mean, he’s heading back to London soon, for one, and…”

_And it’s not like he’d ever feel that way about me, anyway._

“No, Teen, don’t think like that – any guy would be lucky to have your attention. Newt likes you, you know; he’s a lot more comfortable around you than me, and I know he does like you spending time with him in that case.” Queenie took her sister’s hands in her own, looking her straight in the eye. “That picture really upset you, and I know it did – but you don’t gotta worry about it, Tina, I promise.”

Tina knew better than to get her hopes up – she’d done so before and only had her heart broken – but a part of her felt admittedly curious. “The girl in that picture…do you know who she is?”

“An old friend of his from when he was at school,” Queenie said, giving her fingers a tight squeeze for reassurance. “Leta Lestrange – they were real close once but she…she hurt him, Teen, she took from him without giving. It’s why he has so much trouble with other people, why he ain’t got so many friends – because _she_ hurt him so bad.”

She thought about Newt, about how awkward he was around other humans and how closely bonded he was with his creatures, and it made sense; his beasts wouldn’t judge him, would not consider him strange in any way – unlike _people_. The idea that someone had done something to him to make him feel so unable to connect with others – someone who had broken his heart – made her feel so _angry_ , and she found herself disliking the girl from the picture for an entirely different reason.

“They’re through with, Teen,” Her sister continued softly. “She _did_ break his heart, and he’s still hurting about it even now… A part of him still loves her, even after what she did – but that just makes it hurt more.”

Tina suddenly looked away and down at their linked hands, trying to find something she could say; there was so much swimming around in her head that she felt overwhelmed, a flurry of emotion making it difficult to respond. “That’s awful,” She muttered finally, shaking her head slowly. “It’s just…” _Poor Newt_.

Queenie smiled sadly. “I ain’t gonna push things, Teen – it’s none my business – but Leta Lestrange was a taker, someone who took so much from him without giving back…and what he needs is a giver.”

* * *

 

It was early morning when Tina accompanied Newt to the docks, preparing herself to see him off; he had stayed for another week, just to book his passage and gather his things together, and in that time she had grown accustomed to him being around. The fact that he was going to be gone made her more miserable than she cared to admit, though she passed it off as the fact that he was a friend – of course she would miss him, as would Queenie.

He stopped walking just before they reached the boarding gate, turning to her; she smiled somewhat anxiously at him, and he offered a shy grin in return. “Well, it’s been…”

“Hasn’t it!” There was a pause where they merely looked at each other, somewhat unsurely, before she continued quickly. “Listen, Newt, I wanted to thank you.”

“What on Earth for?”

“Well, if you hadn’t said all those nice things to Madam Picquery about me, I wouldn’t be back on the investigative team now.”

“Well…I can’t think of anyone that I’d rather have investigating me,” Newt said – and then he cringed, clearly regretting his choice of words.

Tina smiled appreciatively, somewhat amused even in the awkwardness that had followed. “Try not to need investigating for a bit.”

“I will,” He agreed, clearly relieved that she hadn’t taken his words the wrong way. “Quiet life for me from now on…back to the Ministry, deliver my manuscript…”

“I’ll look out for it,” She promised eagerly. “ _Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them_.”

Newt looked simply stunned as he stared at her, clearly taken aback – almost as if he were seeing her in a new light for the first time. It was this that made Tina pluck up what courage she could, even though the words felt like tar in her throat.

“Does Leta Lestrange like to read?”

He blinked. “Who?”

“The girl whose picture you carry,” She said carefully, heart beating in her chest hard for some reason – she couldn’t quite place why though.

Newt hesitated before answering, his response careful. “I don’t really know what Leta likes these days, because people change.”

“… _Yes._ ”

“I’ve changed, I think,” He continued, as though it were a dawning realization. “Maybe a little.”

Delight washed over Tina at his words, even as she tried her best not to allow herself to get her hopes up – it would only end with her getting hurt, she reminded herself, as it always did. Instead, she found herself struggling not to cry at the sudden flurry of conflicting emotions running through her.

The ship’s siren sounded, signalling for the last of the passengers to board; Newt turned to her quickly, his voice earnest and eager. “I’ll send you a copy of my book, if I may.”

Tina couldn’t stop herself from beaming, eyes still glistening with tears. “I’d like that.”

He gazed at her, awkwardly affectionate – and then he reached forwards, fingers gently pushing back a tuft of her hair behind her ear. Lingering, for a long intense moment they stared into each other’s eyes.

Before she could think of anything to say, Newt had moved away hurriedly and left her standing on her own; stunned but also feeling her heart sinking, Tina raised a hand to where his fingers had been on her hair just seconds previously. It had been so brief that she wondered if it was possible that she’d imagined it; even if she hadn’t, he probably hadn’t meant anything by it: _of course he wouldn’t have-_

Suddenly Newt had reappeared, speaking quickly and nervously. “I’m so sorry – how would you feel if I gave you your copy in person?”

 _In person_ – he would come back to New York just to give her his book, to see _her_.

“I’d like that.” A radiant smile broke out on Tina’s face, and she laughed tearfully. “Very much!”

He grinned at her, seeming almost _relieved_ and pleased, before turning and walking away once more for the boat. She watched him, her smile still wide, as he started up the gangplank before stopping; he seemed unsure of how to act. He deliberated for a brief second before moving on without looking back, leaving her alone in the empty harbour.

 _Newt’s coming back,_ Tina thought, and a burst of happiness exploded in her chest – it wouldn’t be long until his book was published, surely, and then she would see him again. She would be eagerly awaiting his book, of course – all of these creatures were so interesting, and reading about them would provide her more insight on them – but it was undeniable that she would look forward to seeing _him_ more.

With that in her mind, she allowed herself a small skip of excitement as she walked out of the harbour, overjoyed and happier than she had been in a long time.

* * *

 

The search for Grindelwald after his escape had led the Auror team to Paris; it was unknown as to what he was looking for or doing in the city, though it could be assumed that he was looking for others to join his cause. Tina had been among those sent to France to look for him, to help the British and French investigative teams, and while she was eager to do the right thing – in this case, hunting for an extremely dangerous wizard experienced in the Dark Arts – she did still feel slightly anxious as to what the future would hold.

Most importantly, she missed Queenie. It was difficult being separated from her sister, especially after so many years of cohabiting together. She had no doubts that Queenie could handle herself, of course, but it was only natural for her to worry – they were all each other had in the world, after all, and she still wanted to protect her sister in any way she could. The blonde had merely smiled and patted her arm when she left, telling her, “I’m a big girl now, Teen, don’t you worry about me. Just keep yourself safe.”

Frankly, there wasn’t anything to make her feel anything _but_ safe so far; their search had been largely unsuccessful, with no trace of Grindelwald or his followers to go on. For all any of them knew, he had already left Paris and gone elsewhere – the possibility of this being the case increased with each day, and most of the team were getting rather frustrated. It was all Tina could think about and she threw herself into her work; she wanted to assist in recapturing Grindelwald, of course, but it was also because it provided her with a distraction from other things.

Like how Newt hadn’t written to her in several months.

It was a silly thing to get upset over, she knew, but she couldn’t help it; he was most likely busy with his book, of course, hence why he hadn’t written…but it still hurt. It was almost as if he had forgotten about his promises to her, about the goodbye they had shared at the harbour – forgotten about _her_. Tina didn’t want to admit it, but she had found her feelings developing for him ever since his visit; he had seemed so different, the first of so many men who actually seemed to respect her work or notice any potential, and it had made her feel warm inside.

 _Of course he doesn’t like me back like that,_ She would scold herself sternly, though her heart was aching; _we’re friends and nothing more. Besides, he’s not the first guy to pass me off…why would he be any different?_

A part of her wondered if Newt had rekindled his romance with Leta Lestrange – her sister had been wrong before on such matters, and it wouldn’t have surprised Tina if he had decided to return to Leta. She still remembered the photograph of the other woman, of how beautiful and sultry she had looked, and it would have made perfect sense for him to want to be with her again.

 _I don’t blame him,_ she thought miserably in bed one night, the one time she was unable to use work as a distraction. _Who’d want plain old prickly Porpentina over someone like that Leta Lestrange girl?_

But there were far more important things than men to worry over, Tina had told herself firmly, like Grindelwald being loose once more, like making sure that she and her sister had enough food to eat and enough money for the rent. If Newt didn’t want to write her back then that was his decision – he had his own life to lead, and she had hers.

After all, there were people being killed every day, wars brewing – feeling upset over not being wanted by a man was really ridiculously trivial in comparison.

* * *

 

The last person Tina would have expected to make her feel loved and beautiful was an awkward British Magizoologist with messy hair and freckles – but he did, and she couldn’t help but revel in it.

Newt had a way of looking at her, she noticed, as if she were the most important thing in the room sometimes – as if he couldn’t help himself from looking at her. It made her feel warm and tingly inside, a strange but not altogether unpleasant sensation, and she couldn’t help but allow herself to fall deeper in love with him. Even when her mind reminded her of how she had been hurt, of how things were before, her heart had overruled because she knew he was different – _this_ was different.

What he saw in her, she couldn’t possibly tell – but she was happy, and so it seemed silly to question it.

It was only on their wedding night that these insecurities made themselves present once more; she had been nervous enough as it was, but then Tina found that Queenie had left rather racy lingerie in her suitcase – and her usual comfortable pyjamas were nowhere to be found. The delicate lacy slips were far too small for comfort, barely reaching her thigh and showing more than was necessary, and when she looked at her reflection in the mirror of the hotel bathroom she had found herself feeling and looking absolutely foolish.

And so she panicked.

She was _not_ Queenie; she was not sexy or outgoing or even confident enough in herself to wear such a thing, even in front of her now-husband. Newt would most likely take one look at her and laugh, Tina thought miserably, because she looked ridiculous – no man in their right mind would have possibly thought her attractive in a slip…and then naked. No, he would most likely see her in either the slip or without any clothing and regret marrying her immediately.

As she made her way out of the bathroom, she prepared herself: once he had finished laughing, then she would offer to sleep on the couch ( _sofa_ , he would probably correct) so that he didn’t feel obligated to fulfil any intimate marital duties on her behalf. Perhaps they could have a happy marriage without such a thing, even if the thought itself made her feel saddened.

As it soon transpired, there had been no need to panic at all.

Once over the initial awkwardness and embarrassment of seeing the slip (or, rather, more skin than he ever had before), Newt had been nothing but adoring and doting to her; he had murmured endearments to her as he slipped the straps off her shoulders, his kisses making her skin warm and a fire in her belly alight. Even when the slip came off completely and she was left completely naked, he had looked at her with a mix of adoration and lust, a look of hunger and want.

_Don’t hide, Tina…you’re beautiful._

_I’m not really. I’m…I’m rather plain…plain old boring Porpentina._

_You’re not. You’re absolutely perfect._

His kisses had chased her self-consciousness away, made her feel safe, and it hadn’t taken very long for things to progress from there. When they were joined in the most intimate way possible – and it was so much more intimate than Tina could have ever imagined – he had been attentive to her needs, unable to help himself from touching her; his words had been no louder than whispers, but they seemed so loud and firm to her as they made love.

_So perfect…my beautiful wife. I love you so much._

Newt had satisfied her first, and it was this that seemed to be his own undoing as he fell over the edge just seconds later. He had pressed gentle kisses to her face, his smile shy but contagious as he looked down at her beneath him; he repeated his sentiments of love for her, voice soft with emotion, and it made her heart feel like it was about to explode from her chest.

Afterwards, as they drifted off to sleep together, Tina couldn’t help but smile to herself; she had never been so content and happy as she was with him as her husband beside her, and she found herself looking forward to spending the rest of her life with him just like this.

* * *

 

By the time Tina was four months along with their first child, Queenie was six along with her and Jacob’s second – and she looked extremely radiant with it too.

“I’m so happy for you and Newt!” Her sister hummed happily once they were alone together – Jacob had taken Newt out for a drink to celebrate the fact they were both to be fathers (for a second time, in the stouter man’s case), and it left the two witches some time to catch up. “He’s so thrilled about the baby, Teen – he’s gonna be a wonderful father.”

Tina couldn’t help but smile in agreement. “I know…He’s already started getting the nursery in the house ready, even though it’s not going to happen until June.”

“He’s just excited,” Queenie laughed fondly, and she placed a hand on her own round stomach. “Jacob’s been blissful since I told him about the second one – he already loves Toby so much, spoils him rotten, and he can’t wait for this one.” Her eyes were shining as she looked up, beaming to herself. “He don’t mind if it’s a boy or girl – neither of us do – but I know he’s secretly hoping it’s a girl.”

Tina honestly hadn’t thought about a preference on the baby’s gender, and she was certain Newt hadn’t either; they had both agreed that the only thing that mattered was the baby being healthy and safe. Given the brewing wars in Europe from both the magical and muggle communities, it was a practical and reasonable wish.

They had talked over mugs of hot cocoa (coffee was, sadly, out of the question) before a half-hearted wail had interrupted them; Queenie had practically bounced from her seat, even with a growing bump to impede her, and left to go to one of the bedrooms in the apartment. Less than a minute later she re-entered the kitchen, this time holding a small blonde toddler to her chest and cooing gently.

“It’s okay, Mama’s here…Mama’s got you, baby…”

Toby was much bigger than he’d been when Tina had last seen him – then again, that _had_ been just after he’d been born. He seemed to be the perfect mix of her sister and Jacob, she mused, with blonde hair and pink chubby cheeks; when he peered over at her curiously from his mother’s arms, she noticed that he now had brown eyes like his father.

For a moment, she allowed herself to wonder what her and Newt’s child would look like; a little boy with dark hair, perhaps, or a girl with his ruddy coloured hair running about the case and giggling. Maybe their baby would take after their father completely or – Morrigan forbid – be _her_ spitting image.

“…M’ma,” Toby lisped, suddenly burying his face into his mother’s shoulder. “M’ma…”

Queenie’s voice was a soft whisper as she murmured sweet nothings to him, rubbing his back and beaming to herself; her sister suited motherhood well, though this was far from a surprise. Toby seemed to melt into her touch, clinging to her and giving a small sleepy smile; it was obvious that he adored his mother and loved her unconditionally.

A flash of bitter panic ran through Tina as she watched her sister and nephew – she wasn’t anywhere near as maternal as Queenie, not even close, and it struck her that it was highly likely she never would be. Toby clearly loved his mother so much, loved her because she was soft and warm and a _mother_ , but Tina couldn’t see herself as any of these things: she was practical, a career girl, an Auror – but she wasn’t a motherly person at all.

 _What if the baby hates me?_ She wondered anxiously, suddenly feeling unwell, _What if they never want to be near me?_

Queenie was suddenly frowning, even as she cradled her son in her arms and sat down. “Teenie, stop it: that’s not gonna happen and you know it. Of course the baby will love you.”

“I’m sorry,” Tina mumbled, and she lowered her head to hide the fact that the thought had made her eyes sting with tears. “It’s just…hormones, I guess. It’s stupid, don’t worry.”

“It ain’t stupid,” Her sister huffed. “Tina, you’re gonna be a _wonderful_ mother and I know it - Newt knows it too.”

The older witch sighed, shaking her head. “It’s just… It’s silly, but…”

“It ain’t always been easy for me, actually,” Queenie said carefully, reading her thoughts. “I was scared too just before I had Toby; I was scared he wouldn’t like me, scared MACUSA would find out ‘bout our family and tear us apart… But when I held him, Teen, it fell into place so easy.”

“It…It did?”

The blonde nodded, her lips tugging up into a small fond smile. “Just you wait, Teenie; it all seems so scary now, waiting for all these months for it to happen, but when that baby comes you’ll know what I mean. You won’t be alone either,” She reminded her earnestly. “You’ll have Newt – and you know he’ll be a fantastic father.”

Despite the worries still nagging on her mind, Tina couldn’t help but smile to herself in agreement; her sister was right, of course. Even if she _was_ an atrocious mother (and she desperately hoped she wasn’t), Newt would be by her side the entire way through; he would be there to help, no matter what, and they would be raising this baby together – _as a team_ , she thought to herself.

The thought of impending motherhood still daunted Tina, and it would for some time, but she allowed herself to be comforted by the knowledge that she wouldn’t be completely alone.

* * *

 

The sound of Phoenix’s cries from the front room made Tina immediately start to panic; she had left the room for just a few seconds, just to collect some paperwork that needed finishing, and her son had been happily playing on the floor with some enchanted wooden blocks that his uncle and aunt had sent over for his first birthday. Her stomach – now noticeably swollen, thanks to another baby – prevented her from moving too quickly, but she hurried as fast as she could down the stairs and to the sitting room.

Her son – only barely seventeen months old – was on his side by the coffee table and screaming loudly; Tina felt her heart constrict as she bent to pick him up from the floor, worry overtaking her. “It’s alright, Phoenix, it’s okay…I’m here, it’s alright…”

He was still screaming as she checked him over for injuries; to her horror, a large egg-shaped bump was forming just above his eyebrow, the area already purple and bruised from where had presumably bumped his head. When she tried to get a better look, he merely squirmed and tried to pull away, wanting to get away from her touch – wanting to get away from _her_.

Tina felt like bursting into tears herself just as the fireplace roared to life; Newt stepped out, the grin on his face immediately fading as he took in the situation. “Merlin’s beard, what’s wrong?!” He dropped his case rather carelessly to the floor, hurriedly making his way over to the two of them. “Tina, is he alright? What’s happened?”

“I…I don’t know,” She choked out, shaking her head. “I think he bumped his head… I left the room for less than a minute, I needed the paperwork to send in to Dawkins, and he just started screaming…”

“It’s fine,” He assured her quickly, and he took their son into his arms. “Alright, Phee, I know that hurts…let me take a look at you…”

Phoenix started to quieten down as his father gently pushed his hair back to look at the area, still sniffling but growing calmer by the second. Newt hummed before rubbing at his son’s back to comfort him, his tone soft and low.

“That’s right, there’s no need to kick up such a fuss… You promised you’d behave for Mummy, didn’t you?” He joked weakly. “You need to look after her, remember? Wouldn’t want to tire her out when she’s carrying your little brother or sister now, would you?”

The calm look on their son’s face made Tina burst into tears as she left the room, hormones getting the better of her; leaving her husband bewildered, she retreated upstairs and to the bedroom before locking the door behind her and sitting down on the bed to have a good cry.

_What kind of mother am I? I can’t even get my son to stop crying… Mercy Lewis, it’s no wonder he loves Newt more._

She really was an awful mother, she thought miserably: first, Phoenix had gotten hurt because she’d been _stupid_ and left him alone – and then she couldn’t even comfort him when he needed it. He had wanted her to get away from him, and it hurt Tina more than she cared to admit; her own son hadn’t even wanted her near him, sensing how inadequate she was as his mother.

And then there was the new baby.

How was she supposed to be an adequate mother to _two_ children when one already seemed to despise her? They hadn’t planned this at all – they hadn’t planned Phoenix, and they certainly hadn’t planned to have a second child so close after the first – and she found herself overwhelmed by it.

It was only ten minutes later that she heard a tentative knock on the door and her husband’s voice; he was capable of unlocking the door himself, of course, but she knew he would leave her for a while if she wanted. A part of her wanted to hide herself away, was too ashamed to face him – but the other part reasoned that she had to talk to him about it, to clarify and sort things out, and it was this that made her unlock the door for him.

Newt was silent as he entered the room, leaving the door slightly ajar before making his way over to the bed to sit with her. “Tina…”

“I’m sorry,” Tina blurted, hiding her face in her hands. “I shouldn’t have left him, I know, but it was for a few seconds and I thought it would be okay-”

“I’m not angry at all, love,” He interrupted, putting his hands on her shoulders. “Tina, this isn’t your fault – accidents happen, especially to children when they’re playing. It’s just a part of life.”

“But…But he didn’t want to be near me,” She disagreed tearfully. “He hates me.”

Newt looked appalled. “Of course he doesn’t hate you, Tina! Merlin, he absolutely loves you more than anything – he was just upset because he got hurt, that’s all. I put him down for a nap, and when he wakes up he’ll have forgotten the entire thing altogether-”

But she was shaking her head, hands on her stomach and shoulders trembling slightly. “I’m an awful mother, Newt: I’m usually at work and you’re with him, but the one day I’m left alone with him and he gets _hurt_. And then there’s _this_ baby – this one will hate me too-”

“Tina, love, that’s ridiculous,” He muttered firmly. “Contrary to what you seem to believe, there have been days where I’ve been alone with him and he’s gotten hurt – or where he’s simply just continued to cry no matter what I do. It doesn’t mean he hates either of us, I promise you.”

“I know, it’s just…” Tina gnawed on her lower lip nervously. “I worry every day, Newt, that I’m not a good enough mother to him; I want to be, I do, and I want to keep him safe from these wars that are going on, but…but I feel like I’m _failing_.”

Newt’s arm tentatively wrapped around her shoulders, and she welcomed his embrace by leaning against his side. “You’re not failing at all – neither of us are; Phoenix is a healthy, wonderful little boy, and I’m sure that we’ll do just as well if this next one. You’re a fantastic mother, even if you can’t quite see it right now… Do you know how much he misses you when you’re away at work?” When she shook her head, he smiled. “He misses you terribly, Tina, and it’s only when he sees that you’ve come home that he seems light up. He loves you so much, and I know that the new baby will too when they arrive.”

Her eyes were filling with tears again but for a different reason entirely, and it felt as though a heavy weight had been lifted from her shoulders all of a sudden; it was almost certainly her hormones making her more emotional and self-conscious than usual, but it was still a relief to hear her husband say these things aloud. It seemed silly, in hindsight, to allow herself to grow self-conscious over this – but it was truly something that had been playing on her mind for some time.

When Phoenix woke from his nap an hour later, Tina was sure to be there immediately; the moment he saw her enter the room, he beamed and reached out for her. As she picked him up and held him against her chest, she couldn’t help but feel her heart soar in her chest.

Sure, she wasn’t a mother quite like Queenie was – she didn’t stay at home or know exactly what was bothering her child immediately – but Newt had been right: if the way their son had beamed at her was any indication, she really wasn’t doing such a bad job of motherhood after all.

* * *

 

The best part of the evenings were always when the children had been put to bed; they both loved the children dearly, of course, and they would do anything for them – but it was nice to have some time alone, even so.

The sky outside had turned a dark orange as the sun set, casting looming shadows across the Scamander property and bathing the grass in a warm glow. Newt had retreated inside just to make himself a cup of tea and a mug of hot cocoa for her, and so Tina was left alone outside to look over the garden.

The quiet evenings gave her a lot of time to think, she had found, especially with how busy things were during the day; between the children and work, it was difficult to have time to think properly. As she looked out at the countryside beyond their home, at trees and green hills, it was easy for her mind to wander and consider things.

In the aftermath of Grindelwald’s defeat just months previously, Tina had found herself remembering her encounter in New York with him more and more; something he had said to her whilst pretending to be Graves, whilst duelling her, had started to play in her mind recently. It was so many years ago now that it was irrelevant, really – but she couldn’t help it.

_Tina, you’re always turning up where you’re least wanted._

Perhaps it had been because he’d been wearing Graves’ face – or maybe because she _knew_ , deep down, he had been right. At Ilvermorny, the other students hadn’t wanted to be near her – they had thought her odd or strange because she felt out of place and awkward, because she wasn’t sure what to say to get them to like her; since she’d been a teenager, any _boys_ she had ever felt even slightly attracted to had preferred her younger sister, finding _her_ plain and boring in comparison. Even when she had worked at MACUSA, in a job she had loved more than anything, she had felt that her colleagues were irritated by her because she always stuck her nose into other people’s business.

But then she had met Newt, and it all changed.

Her husband was always sure to remind her how much he loved her, how much he appreciated her, and she always felt _wanted_ by him: whether it was her company in his case or in bed he craved, he _wanted_ her by his side and no one else. He wasn’t the only one who wanted her: their children – four beautiful, healthy children – wanted and needed her too, and she would have done anything for them. To add, her career since joining the British Ministry had taken a positive turn; she was a part of the Senior Team, highly-trained Aurors who dealt with the more dangerous and extreme criminals as well as training the younger and newer recruits – and she was well-respected for it, something she hadn’t quite achieved with MACUSA.

As Newt returned, setting her hot cocoa down and pressing a kiss to her forehead, Tina couldn’t help but smile to herself; here, with her husband and their children, she knew that she was far from unwanted at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that ending sucked but…yeah. I tried :’)
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed this fic – I can’t believe it’s over! It’s been 9-10 months in the making, and I’m so glad that I’ve finally managed to post it because I wanted to get it out there. I have loved studying Tina, I really have, and I’ve put a lot of myself into her in this fic whilst also staying true to her character – I just hope I did her some justice.
> 
> Please let me know what you thought :D

**Author's Note:**

> So I decided to split the fic up into multiple parts because it’s so long. The next part will pick up to the events just after the film and onwards :)
> 
> Please feel free to leave comments or likes <3 It makes me so happy!
> 
> Like what I post? Why don't you check out [my Ko-fi page](https://www.ko-fi.com/meganwalsh)?


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